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I look around and there are no parking spaces or rubbish bins or even a river. It does not look like at all like a launch site. I watch as Chuck unloads the canoe from the truck, unable to help with the unwieldy craft. He shows me where I'll be sitting in the canoe and we begin to load and stow our gear from the truck into the canoe."What's in the drybags, Chuck?" Mainly things we might need. A first aid kit, towels, clothing, overnight stuff in case we have a mishap, a limb saw." A limb saw?" You never know when we might need to amputate."I must have looked horrified, because he laughed and said, "Sometimes trees fall across the stream. If I clear a path this time, I won't have to drag the canoe around it next time." Chuck consults a checklist to make sure we have everything and then tells me to "sit tight". I suddenly grasp that he is about to drive away while I sit with the canoe in the middle of the woods."But Chuck, what if a bear tries to eat me."He chuckles and gives me a big. .. I should have spotted a hustle,but at the time I was thinking with a whole different muscle.She tied me to the bed which seemed nice and kinky;then she recited something made me feel all hinky.Her voice got real deep and it thundered- satanic!As her eyes burned bright red I'll confess that I panicked.She sneered, "You insulted my sisters and me,before the whole nation, quite offhandedly..."But I looked good enough when you wanted to fuck,you butt-ugly bastardly hypocrite schmuck!"And then I beheld in the mirror above me,a scene straight from the X-Files! (w/ David Duchovney)I was shrinking and turning a much darker hue,my dick and balls shrivelled my boobs grew and grew!And when that mysterious glow did subside-"Oh where did my weenie go?" I cried, cried and cried.I wailed, "Whatchoo wanna do me like dat fo?Oh lawdy lawdy, I'se a nappy haired Ho!"She smiled, "We'd agreed that free speech was fine.Well when I said that spell I was just practicing mine."Words can't hurt people,.
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